"He's Not My Grandpa. He's My Dad." (4/12/07 p. E1)

The ethical issues that were raised in this article, "He's Not My Grandpa. He's My Dad" were not necessarly considered ethical or unethical. It depends on how the situration is viewd and whether or not it hits close to home for readers.

The article began by informing readers that actor Tony Randall was anxious to become a father, at the age of 77. He said he looked forward to only being 90, yes 90, when his unborn child was 15 and they could go out and play together. Unfortunately, Mr. Randall died at age 84 in 2004, leaving being Julia, who was 7 and Jefferson, who was only 6. Like other young children, Julia and Jefferson will grow up not knowing and maybe not even remembering their father. Is that ethical? That Mr. Randall wanted children so badly, even though the possibility of him not seeing them grow up was very great?

Men like Randall that have children in their mush later years of life have been dubbed start-over dads, or SODs for short. SODs have created their own little controversy. Some see these older fathers as having the advantage of being more laid back and easy going on their youngsters. Others, however, see SODs as inherently selfish. These people claim that it is not fair the child that they may and probably will grow up without a father. According to the article, people are outraged that SODs are intentionally depriving a child of a father. But what if all start-over dad wanted before he died was a child? Does fulfilling someone's dream of becoming a father even though he may be older make him a bad, selfish person?

According to The Times, this is such a new phenomenon that there is a dearth of studies about it. Men are living longer and having families they may have never been given the chance to have. I don't see this as unethical, but as a chance for a person to experience parenthood.

Another plus to SODhood is that most of these men aren't struggling financially. They have made their place in the working world and most are very well off. They can support their family fully and afford to give their children more of what other, younger fathers may not be able to.

On the flip side, however, there are growing indications that SODhood may entail risks for children. Studies have shown that older fathers are more likely to have children with autism, schizophrenia, dwarfism, and other serious problems. These are pretty serious risk. If these kinds of problems are repeatedly showing up, these SODs may want to look into adoption if becoming a father is something they desire. To possibly have to put a child through any of the listed risked doesn't seem worth it.

Emotional and physical problems are very common in families with SODs as well. One father, Moe Belin, 84, has a 17-year old daughter, Mollie. He suffered a heart attack and when he came to all he wanted was his daughter. When she was brought to him, he got sick on her. "It bothers me that i put this little girl through that," Belin said. Many other fathers are finding themselves at the mercy of serious health problems that they are unable to shield their young children from.

Tony Randall's widow, Heather, wonders if she did the right thing for her children by her decision. She explains she has strains of guilt after all. She tells her daughter she maybe shouldn't marry and older man. Mr. Randall will never get to see his children graduate, go off to college, or walk his daughter down the aisle. Most SODs won't have these kinds of chances either.

The ethics here don't point fingers at what is right or wrong, because in the end it is ultimately each person's choice. Many elderly males may see their time as limited and want to rush to become a father. They're in such a hurry that many of the real, need to be considered factors of SODhood are neglected until it is too late.

Article by: THOMAS VINCIGUERRA